I keep trying to stay above this force of sadness and dread wrapped around my ever-shrinking ankles. My legs are stronger and it's getting easier to keep afloat, but I don't hold my breath as I wait for my life to begin again. Kicking around, the waves of horror and distraction slosh around my shoulders and neck and try to poison my mind by seeping through my lips and ears. Who knows how long I will last before I snap into pieces? Suddenly, I get a realization: I don't think I'll break under this pressure. I see in the distance love and peace. My life boat has arrived, and I think it's here to stay for awhile. The paddle floats along side the boat, joining in our quest to find safety. I crawl into the embrace of my life, and the sides block out the black waters of fiction and fantasy mixed with the sharp, icy bits of reality. I make my way home to my heart, the paddle moving easily in my hands. My thoughts are at rest at last as I feel the waves move against the shore in my soul, and I know I'm close to finally being back to where I belong. All thanks to my life boat and my paddle. And my trust in myself.
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